Do You Suffer From Jersey Shore Summer Weekend Syndrome? [Jersey’s Point of Lou]
It ‘s a summer weekend at the Jersey shore. Here comes the traffic and the crowds again. Are you showing symptoms of ‘Jersey Shore Summer Weekend Syndrome’? So, what are the symptoms?
Here are the signs to watch out for. If you begin to physically shake at the mere mention of the word ‘Parkway’ you may have ‘Jersey Shore Summer Weekend Syndrome’. Another more subtle sign of this symptom is a sudden, unexplainable love for county roads.
Another telltale sign of JSSWS is an unhealthy, persistent desire to not give up the parking spot in front of your house. Signs of this include the willingness to walk several miles for a gallon of milk and constant, suspicious peeks out your front window.
And then there’s what experts refer to as “order-in-disease” (OID). This affliction involves begging your spouse or partner to have dinner delivered rather than face the fear of a 60 minute wait at the restaurant. You can tell that a person in the car in front of you has OID when you observe the vehicle slow down in front of the restaurant so the occupants can determine how many people are lingering outside the restaurant.
A very common affliction associated with JSSWS is BBOSF (Bad Bikini or Speedo Fear). People affected by this are afraid they will see something on the beach they will never forget no matter how hard they try.
Unfortunately the only known cure for JSSWS is September 4th.
[Jersey’s Point of Lou is a weekly column featuring the opinions of 94.3 The Point’s Lou Russo sounding off about everything Jersey. Have a topic you’d like to see Lou talk about? Leave a comment below]