Stupid Car
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With the amount of time we spend in our cars, we get to see a lot. Lately I've been noticing an abundance of stupid stuff on other folks vehicles. Here are the top 5 that annoy me.

 

Honor Bumper Stickets
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5

Proud Parent of...

 
 
Let me start off by saying that you should be very proud of your children. However, plastering it on the back of the minivan is kind of arrogant. Not to mention it starts the firestorm of reaction bumper stickers that follow. Like, "Proud Parent of the Child Who Beat Up Your Honor Student," and "Proud Parent...Period." Folks we get it, your kids are the best. Remind us once a year at Christmas with your update novel...I mean letter, and spare your car the attention.
 
Car Eyelashes
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4

Eyelashes, Lips, Antlers or Any Human or Animal Body Part

 
 
This one is so puzzling to me. I don't understand why anyone would want eyelashes on their car. Oh wait, I get it now! The eyelashes make the headlights look like eyes. LOL, that's a riot. Really? I mean without the lashes this BMW is an awesome ride. With the lashes, it becomes a joke. Are these people in such desperate need of companionship that they resort to turning their Taurus' into a person? If your car has lips, seek help immediately.
 
Baby On Board
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3

Baby on Board Signs

 
 
You know, it's a good thing that parents let us know they have an infant in the car with them. Because naturally if we don't see that yellow warning in the window, we drive like reckless maniacs smashing into every vehicle in our sights. That is, unless there's a "Baby on Board." In that case, we'll weave around you and take out a street sign or mailbox instead.
 
Fake Bullet Holes
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2

Fake Bullet Holes

 
 
I'm not a crazy person when it comes to keeping my car exterior looking pristine, but it's questionable when one goes out of their way to make their vehicle look "homeless." If the bullet hole stickers fall off anytime soon, let me save you $9.95. It's called Newark.
 
Car Nuts
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1

Car Nuts

 
 
These are usually swinging from a pickup, but I'm sure they're attached to a Prius somewhere to give it some "balls." I don't think I'm in the minority, but if I see these on a vehicle I instantly assume the person inside is a douche bag. Now I may be wrong, but let's break this down. In order to have the end result of hanging testicles from the back of a car, one first must pay money to obtain them. Next, said person has to spend valuable time attaching them. Finally, they must have the "stones" to be associated with them dangling on their vehicle everyday. In closing, nothing says "chick magnet" like a dude with...car nuts.
 

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