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What To Do When the Guy You’re Falling For Dumps You

sad girl
(photo by anitapeppers, morguefile)

Ever dated a guy, got really close to him, felt yourself falling for him, and then he just disappears? Here are ten tips on how to get through this awfulness.

Experts offer some advice on how to get past the guy you were falling for…who seems to have just dumped you without so much as a text.

1. Be Patient. It’s not likely, but something serious might be happening in his life so give him the benefit of the doubt but do NOT contact him!

2. Distract Yourself. Fill up your calendar with fun things like girls’ nights. Do whatever it takes to keep yourself from going crazy with curiosity.

3. Don’t Stalk Him. Checking his dating profiles, Facebook page, Twitter or calling his friends is a big no-no. You’ll just find more information to obsess about. He’s not giving you any attention, so return the favor.

4. Don’t Worry About Why. If you don’t hear from him you’ll probably be tempted to replay every conversation, re-read text messages and even make things up in your head. This is not productive. Even if something catastrophic has happened, he doesn’t want you involved. If he wants to call it quits and not tell you why, don’t worry about the reason.

5. Accept That You’ve Been Dumped by Someone who is Selfish and Rude. After he’s gone MIA for a week it’s safe to assume you’ve been dumped. Remind yourself that he’s inconsiderate. If something was wrong, he should have pointed it out. Be glad things didn’t move further with this guy.

6. Allow Yourself One Afternoon to be Sad. It’s okay to cry it out during a full-blown pity party, just put on your big girl pants when it’s over and move on. (Easier said than done, I think.)

7. Respect That He Isn’t Perfect. He may have caused you a lot of pain, but is probably doing the best he can. It’s safe to say he doesn’t have great communication skills and needs to grow up.

8. Get Closure, If You Need To. You can send a one or two-line email as soon as you know it’s really over. Don’t write too much or tell him off. He knows what he’s done. Take the opportunity to wish him well.

9. Take a Break. You might envision running into him at a local bar or him begging for you back when he sees you looking hot on Facebook, but that probably won’t happen. Take a social media break to get him out of your head so you can move on.

10. Learn From It. Look back and see if there were any red flags like bad chemistry or signs he was unhappy, then head forward and try to find-tune your intuition.

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