Dear Mother Nature,

I must say that this has been quite enough. I feel like you are having a temper tantrum because winter is overdue to finish up and honestly it is not helping anything.

No more snow. No more slush. And NO. MORE. NOR'EASTERS! Or else we will be looking to hire a younger, newer replacement who understands when the seasons are supposed to change -- Interested applicants please apply so she knows that we mean business!

You are being rude, inconsiderate, moody, cold, and insensitive. My emotions can't take anymore cold otherwise the love I have for you will freeze right on out of me.

And yes, I am speaking for the entire Jersey Shore.

Consider this your final official warning.

Thank you.


Jersey Shore Management

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