Unplugged Wedding Ceremony Request: Rude or Reasonable?
My wedding is just three days away now (whoa!) and just yesterday, something we have planned for our ceremony proved controversial among my coworkers.
It's an unplugged wedding ceremony. We'd like no phones, no cameras, no devices during the ceremony. (Reception is totally different.)
The conversation started when I posted a viral photo from last year from an Australian wedding photographer:
It shows a groom having to lean over to see his bride coming up the aisle to see his bride because several people are in the aisle taking pictures...meanwhile the photographer's shot of the groom is completely ruined.
I shared the photo and added, "FYI, this is the reason we don't want cameras/phones out before the first dance."
In fact, we'll have a note in our program as well as some artsy signs (poetically) requesting that people put their phones and cameras away, let our hired photographer take the photos (that we'll gladly share,) and just enjoy the moment with us.
A few of my coworkers think it's an unreasonable thing to ask people to do, and that I sound like a bridezilla. One questioned the motives for wanting no other cameras.
The thing is, it has nothing to do with me not wanting other people to have photos of us in their phones, or having 'bad photos' of myself (or Duzzy) floating around.
It's because I don't want to be walking up the aisle and seeing nothing but the backs of cell phones instead of the actual faces of our family and friends.
It's because I hate when people are so busy taking pictures that they don't actually experience what they are filming.
It's because we've hired a professional to take photos, and we would hate to have those pictures ruined by someone standing in front of her with a phone camera (taking shots that will probably come out blurry and unusable anyway!)
It's because it's a short ceremony, and we don't think 20 minutes is too long to ask for the undivided attention of the people who chose to attend.
It's truly because we just want people to enjoy the moment with us.
It's such a pet peeve of mine when I'm out to dinner with someone, or in the middle of a conversation with somebody, and they're not listening to a word I say because they are lost in their phone. And how often have you been to a concert and seen someone so busy filming every song that they miss actually seeing the whole show!
Now, I have absolutely snapped a photo or two during wedding ceremonies in the past, but it's been one or two quick photos at most, I'd NEVER step into the aisle to get the shot, and if the couple requested no photos during the ceremony, I'd abide by their wishes -- and not think anything of it.
I also know we're not the first couple to want this...just go on Pinterest and search "unplugged wedding sign" and dozens and dozens of results come up.
I truly think it's a reasonable request (and even if it's not, I'm asking for it anyway,) but tell me what you think about asking for an unplugged wedding ceremony: reasonable or rude?